Rise From the Ashes

The legend of the phoenix can actually be found in several belief systems. It can be traced back to ancient Egypt, when it was then known as “Bennu” or Bynw”, a symbol of the sun god, Osiris. Osiris was resurrected to life from serving as ruler of the underworld.

Whether this mystical bird is attributed to the Chinese “Feng-huang”, the Jewish “Milcham” or even an emblem of Christ, the legend remains the same…

After serving its life cycle, the phoenix builds a nest and then by the sun and the friction of its own wings, is consumed by fire. It is inevitably reborn from the very ashes. The phoenix is therefore symbolic of resurrection, immortality, and my personal favourite - triumph over adversity.

I has been said repeatedly that there are two types of people in this world: “marathoners” and “sprinters”. Both are ambitious at heart. They set a goal and will pursue it zealously. The only difference is that a sprinter expects to see immediate results and if they do not receive those results, they may get discouraged and give up all together. A marathoner, on the other hand, can get side-tracked, knocked down, and trampled on but will refocus and redirect when necessary in order to meet their ultimate goal.

For example, a woman who had planned to lose 30 pounds in three months may be disappointed upon realizing that after the first month, she has only lost six. She had obviously expected to see faster results. But if that same woman takes into consideration that she is more toned or has more stamina, she may alter her end goal. She may decide “I want to go down a few dress sizes”, or “I want to be able to incorporate fitness and nutrition into my lifestyle permanently.” Along the way, she may miss a few morning jogs or go off her so-called diet, but above all, she is patient with herself and does not give up.

Patience is essential. It’s important to accept that results are not always immediate. Sometimes, they aren’t even tangible. But by just going through the necessary steps, you are on your way, whether you realize it or not. Afterall, the journey of 1000 miles begins with one step. By altering your original goal, you have not fallen short. You have simply become aware enough to realize when and how to strategize.

It was Benjamin Franklin who said, “Some people die at twenty-five and aren’t buried until they are seventy-five”. Some of us passively sit back and watch the rest of life go on because we feel we have had too many set-backs or let-downs to further pursue our dreams. Our patience has run out.

Each and every one of us knows what it's like to get side-tracked, feel knocked down, and even trampled upon by others.  Will you fall back when it comes to your current goals or will you RISE UP more determined to succeed than ever?

Pass It On: On Children

By:  Kahlil Gibran

[An excerpt from The Prophet"]

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you. You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday. You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Do You Need a Vision Board?

According to Wikipedia, "A vision board, also called a dream boards, mind map or goal map, is typically a poster board on which people draw, paste or collage images that represent their desires, objectives, dreams and goals. The intent is that vision boards be reviewed regularly to maintain focus on the depicted goals. Some users believe that regular use of focus boards also attracts superconscious aid via the Law of Attraction."

The Secret, a theory which attributes personal success to "positive thinking" and "the law of attraction" as a daily practice, is a driving force behind the recent popularity of the vision board. After all, the law of attraction is that our thinking creates and brings to us whatever we think about," When we keep our goals in clear view, they are forever on our mind.

My own vision board consists of fitness goals (my ideal body type), relationship goals (closeness/happiness with friends, family, and coworkers), as well as my ideal home office, living room, car, etc.

Creating a vision board is easy as well as fun. Simply select images and words/phrases from magazines that appeal to you. Cut them out and ask yourself the personal significance of each image (What attracted me to this image? What does it represent?). Choose your favourite cut-outs and paste them onto a board (bristol board works best). Place your newly created vision board in an area of your home or office visible enough to look at and "take in" every day.

Happy crafting!

Pass It On: Footprints

One night a man had a dream.

He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord.

Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.

Each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand;

one belonging to him, and the other belonging to the Lord.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him,

he looked back at the footprints in the sand.

He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of

footprints.

He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his

life.

This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord about it.

"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the

way.

But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life,

there is only one set of footprints.

I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me."

The Lord replied: "My precious, precious child,

I love you and I would never leave you.

During your times of trial and suffering,

when you see only one set of footprints,

it was then that I carried you."

Source:  Unknown (Author of poem in dispute)

Pass It On: Creation

The Creator gathered all of Creation and said,
"I want to hide something from the humans until they are ready for it. It is the
realization that they create their own reality."
The eagle said, "Give it to me, I will take it to the moon."
The Creator said, "No. One day they will go there and find it."
The salmon said, "I will bury it on the bottom of the ocean."
"No. They will go there too."
The buffalo said, "I will bury it on the Great Plains."
The Creator said, "They will cut into the skin of the Earth and find it even
there."
Grandmother Mole, who lives in the breast of Mother Earth, and who has no
physical eyes but sees with spiritual eyes, said, "Put it inside of them."
"It is done."


Source:  Unknown (parable)

Friends With Benefits - Cont'd [Wife, Woman, Friend]

Know your worth. Truth.

Pass It On: Our Deepest Fear

By:  Marianne Williamson (quoted by Nelson Mandela)

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

10 Tips to Becoming an AMAZING Woman

They say the key to loving oneself is learning to love God.

The beautiful Shanel Cooper-Sykes speaks.

Pass It On: Love Defined

1 Corinthians 13 (New International Version)

 1 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.
 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
 8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
 13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Past It On: Our Mirror

The good you find in others, is in you too. The faults you find in others, are
your faults as well. After all, to recognize something you must know it.

The possibilities you see in others, are possible for you as well. The beauty
you see around you, is your beauty. The world around you is a reflection, a
mirror showing you the person you are.

To change your world, you must change yourself. To blame and complain will only
make matters worse. Whatever you care about, is your responsibility. What you
see in others, shows you yourself.

See the best in others, and you will be your best. Give to others, and you give
to yourself. Appreciate beauty, and you will be beautiful. Admire creativity,
and you will be creative.

Love, and you will be loved. Seek to understand, and you will be understood.
Listen, and your voice will be heard. Teach, and you will learn.


Source:  Unknown (parable)

Friends With Benefits - Her Perspective

The term "friends with benefits" is nothing new. It was around back when I was in college, which was at least 10 years ago. Personally, I've been in situations where a guy I've been hanging out with will say they want to take things to the next level - meaning sex, OR be more than just friends - meaning sex. I never got my hipsters in a bunch over it. If I was not interested in that person physically, I would just tell them that I only thought of them as a friend and they either respected that or dropped off the face of the Earth.

About 3 years ago, one of my closest male friends propositioned me. He said to me, "I'm single, you're single. What do you think about us hooking up?" In my head I was like, "What the hell for? I do not like you like that!" but I told him politely that I didn't think about him in that way and I couldn't see myself doing anything physical with him. He was really cool about it. He was worried that he may have offended me with his abrupt proposition but I assured him that we were still cool. The friendship picked up right where it left off. I put that night out of my mind and there was no awkwardness between us.

Flash forward 3 years... Said friend and I are hanging out one evening, and he goes, "Are you seeing anyone? Let me ask you another question... do you find me attractive?" Caught off guard, I zoned out for a bit, only to hear him end with, "Would it be okay if I kissed you?"

In my head, I was like, "Seriously? Again?" but the curious side of me wanted to see what it would feel like so we kissed for all of 3 seconds and it was... nice. I thought, "Cool. It wasn't like kissing my brother (ewww), I don't feel uncomfortable around him, nothing negative came of it."

Then things got a little messy...

He basically wanted to pick up where we left off that night and take things further.  I entertained the thought at first. Then I had my wake-up call.

I thought to myself, "Gee, this guy has never really spent a dime on me, has never romanced me with his poetry, has never approached me on a "I think highly of you, you're girlfriend material" tip. In actuality, he's meeting girls online all the time as well as flirting with them on Facebook. He is looking for someone dateable and he does not see me as dateable. Should I feel flattered that he wants to sleep with me? Hell no!"  I could not understand how someone who loved me as a person and was physically attracted to me would not see me in a romantic light. All he wanted from me was sex. It was a blow to my self-esteem.

As the woman, the one who holds the cookie, why not save it for someone you're actually dating, give it to someone who's actually interested in you - in a situation where it could lead to something more - a long-term relationship, a commitment... marriage?

If you’re not looking for a commitment (and at age 30, I am), why not save it for someone you're madly attracted to as opposed to settling for someone who you originally put in the "friend zone" for a reason?

It’s as though we constantly have to assess our self-worth and behave accordingly… making no exceptions.

The friends with benefits thing works best when the arrangement is convenient for both parties and both parties are able to seperate sex from love and therefore not catch feelings. What's convenient isn't always what's best for us though. Food for thought.